Asim & Tamreez

There are certain habits of mine that I had thought were incurable. They had almost taken the status of ‘beliefs’ about myself, such as “I am a procrastinator”, “I can never be on time”, “I cannot wake up for fajr” and its related “I’m not a morning person”.

Recently my sister Wardah taught me a very important lesson: We should not make ‘bad habits’ excuses for not doing the things we know are important.

Just to give an example: Wardah told me that sometime back she had vowed that no matter what time she slept, she will wake up for Fajar prayer (performed before sunrise). And after getting over her mental hangups–such as it won’t be possible on nights with just 2 or 3 hours of sleep; or broken sleep would cause lack of concentration in exams; or she wouldn’t even hear the alarm etc etc), she was able to do it regularly once she had made up her mind.

For years now, I had been missing my Fajar prayer and performing it only if I stayed up all night or if I had to wake super early for some reason or praying it kazaa occasionally. It was something that bugged me but I had just taken it for granted that because I had bad sleeping habits, it was impossible to wake up early for fajr. Also I have always had ‘sleep issues’. I fuss if I am not able to sleep properly, I worry about broken sleep, I get grouchy and ‘homicidal’ (to quote a previous roommate!) if someone wakes me up when I don’t want to be woken up etc etc. But after realizing that Wardah, who had also previously been hung up about similar ‘sleep issues’, had been able to overcome them, I felt confident that I could do the same. I’m proud to say that it has worked for me too. I’ve been waking up very regularly for fajar and going back to sleep if I have the time or even staying awake afterwards (since fajar these days can be prayed till about 7 anyway) and I have been fine. In fact I’ve been happier and more content and better able to plan my day.

Today I was 15 minutes late for a seminar. Although there were 2 other people who came later than me, I was absolutely mortified and hated myself for it. Punctuality is a mark of a principled person. I had just taken for granted that I was incapable of always being punctual. Especially in the UK, where people are almost always on time, it’s considered rude/unprofessional/and downright rotten to be late for something. So today I promised myself that I will not be late for any other meeting…even if it’s a casual lunch or dinner or whatever. It is something I’ve been struggling with for years. Although I manage to make it to formal meetings or interviews etc on time, it’s usually just in the nick of time with me huffing and puffing (yeah imagine what great first impressions I must make!). And for other informal things, I’m usually late unless someone forces me not to be. Anyway, today I’ve decided enough is enough. This is not an incurable aspect about my personality. If I can overcome my sleep issues, I can also overcome this.

I WILL NOT BE LATE! No more snoozes, no more last minute checking of emails, no more procrastination. Yes, I can do this.